In its guide to surviving the teen years, KidsHealth.org , which is sponsored by the Nemours Foundation, advises waiting until you see warning signs of a problem before invading your child’s privacy . When I told my mom she didn't believe me nobody in my family would believe me it was really sad and emotional for me and Like, if someone pulls my arm, pushes or pulls me, restrains my arms or my entire body from movement, or shakes me-- basically anything that makes my body move without my wanting it to. I feel bad when I snap on people, but after what I've been through, I can't help it. Like I said, the war isn’t over. Now i know for sure i … Each little thing you do will earn you credit toward getting what you want. For a while, when I was young and naive, I took her word for it. If it's quiet they're probably asleep. Because "what if I died"...!?!! Drove it back to my house, put the bitch up. Someone, please, tell me my parents are psychotic. They disabled the lock on my door because it was their "right" to barge in any time they pleased. I would love to, believe me. And of course removing the bedroom door. If somebody takes control away from me, I lose it. To be unable to lock a door in one's dream suggests there is something in waking life that you cannot handle. My Nmom used to come into the bathroom sometimes when I was showering to make sure I was cleaning myself right. Even though I've completed two essays and have plugged in nearly all necessary information for my first choice school. The doors randomly lock and unlock at very odd times - usually when we are trying to enter the vehicle. Crazy, why would you want your child voluntarily reading books. This left us with the same problem others Mine once came in while I was going and proceeded to lecture me on my tp usage. (Well, part of it is because I'll lock my door and take a nap- and god forbid I get some rest) I don't do anything bad in my room, just draw/read. Then laugh when she flushed and the water went cold. I do not have a problem with drjimmy11, only his inaccurate statement. Parents who let the matter go tend to do so to their cost. But we do not have family nearby and I can not afford $100 to get a sitter for several hours every weekend. Ugh. My parents have recently been griping me about this issue and one day when I was not present, my parents removed my door handle completely. But mine is what I don't understand. My mom absolutely hates that i play video games, and hates video games in general. Still, I wouldn't actually say they're psychotic, but that is a pretty big overreaction imo. That's so bizarre I'm sorry you had to deal with that. My mum would pee while I was showering and would yell at me when I tried to hide my naked body! In all honesty, I just like having that feeling of privacy. Kids failing (compilation). I wasn't. If not, keep doing things quietly in your room, but if your parent(s) lock their doors, carefully try to hear through the door. Yes. I also used to get in trouble for reading at night too. We had no bathroom lock and no shower curtain. As a teenager, I couldn't believe when my friends said they closed their door to play video games and listen to music. I took that as a stab of bitterness This keeps items from being discovered by a quick look under the dresser. “Parents sometimes get very freaked out when their children start locking their bedroom doors, but they really need to relax and not assume the worst,” says Dr. Natasha Mueller, a psychologist. Press J to jump to the feed. I I never understood why kids hoard food and hide snacks and shit like why? I feel I am being violated. Like the cap'n, my goal Lol I doubt it, I already sleep more than average. Really?! They claim I "waste" all my time playing video games (when in reality 80% of my gaming happens when I would otherwise be asleep), and should be farther ahead in my research and scholarship applications and stuff. The only opportunity I get is at night in my room, but I'm afraid because I don't want my parents to hear me or anything. Dinner wasn't ready for another 25 minutes when I got out. My parents have just confiscated both mine and my sister's doors from us. Lazy piece of shit can't fucking take them to the bathroom himself so he makes me do it. I live in a very health-conscious family. I put up with that stuff alll the time. Bring a list of salons or hair shops in your area that specialize in dreadlocks. My mother refused anyone to lock doors. My advice for other parents: do not do this. If by some miracle we have ice cream in the freezer, she'll sneak down at night and eat it. On the other hand, this also means that she would burst into the room without a moments notice and try to "catch" me at something. But maybe that's it, instead of gaming/sleeping, I should be doing "something productive". My ex-grandfather kept “accidentally” barging in while I was changing, or sleeping. When i was at home i would lock my bedroom door and just sit down on my chair, He would then rush over and stick his head into my skirt and start licking me , it felt so good that i would cum fast and that drove him even more lol my parents pulled of my doorknob & lock once because my brother broke his and apparently that meant both of ours had to be broken. If your parents are unfamiliar with the style, they may not know how easy they are to care for once you have them. I don't really understand why. Your brain is still developing your reasoning abilities, and it’s My parents did that so I the next day I went to homedepot asked for a door in X length and height. My sisters and their three friends who were spending the night were in the living room. she wouldn't let me leave so i left without permission. There was no door. She stated it was a "safety" concern. Drove it back to my house, put the bitch up. I only recently had the thought in therapy that they literally did not consider how that sort of thing would impact our relationship. I responded with "I didn't use my debit card... You did." If not, stay 15 to 30 minutes in your room, and check again for silence. I have a very, very specific pet peeve, where if someone touches me in a way that moves one of my body parts against my will, I will snap. I mean, they think that scholarship stuff is wicked important. Fuck parents sometimes man they need to get fucking hit, New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. She's not overweight, but if she doesn't start realizing what she's doing she very well may become fat. Then continue till you get your door back. I always heard that one- "it's my right" / "it's my house" like I get that, but why is privacy a big deal?? In other words, yeah, I get the allure of wearing makeup as a kid. My sister's reason is justified: She hoards candy and snacks and eats them behind my parents' back. ", You shouldn't be doing anything you need to do with a closed door. Mom came home said I don't care if you paid for it with your money you don't deserve to have a door. Dead power door lock switch : The power door lock switch is a relatively simple rocker switch. That was my punishment for arguing with her earlier that day about my needing privacy in the bathroom and in my bedroom when I'm changing clothes. Every child deserves the right to lock their door at certain moments. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. We do not have any age-restriction in place but do keep in mind this is targeted for users between the ages of 13 to 19. And panicking if I didn't check in as soon as I got back to campus from home. Obey!". I own the door and I own you! More like: Assumed lack of progress = poor time management = wasting all free time playing games behind closed doors = remove door for no privacy to game. My own Nmom used to literally wait until I was in my room changing clothes, and then barge in, and hold the door open wide while I was half, or completely naked-- and she'd do it with my sisters, and sister's friends/other guests standing in the hallway. Ugh, this. And my parents have no idea I’ve smuggled a boatload of my mom’s makeup to school. Oh, and I'm supposed to entirely forget my childhood and enter the world at 18 as a blank, unaffected slate. It's hard cause its a very scary situation I was molested by my step dad from 6 years old till I was 16. I’m smiling as I type this, but I’m guessing that your parents remember being your age, and that makes them very nervous for you to have your door closed! I sympathise with the poster. After I calmed down, I apologized and had to explain to her that it's a powerful trigger for me, and why I have that trigger. It's interesting you say that. My Nmom ALWAYS does/did things because of "safety" or "an emergency". Parents, teachers, and the like are welcomed to participate and ask any questions! Well okay then. My parents took off the door from its frame. Honestly, what the fuck? My mom made the excuse that closing my door would affect the air circulation in the house. I have thought about that though. Okay. Recently my dad is making me leave it open so I can "hear the dogs if they bark." This is really upsetting me. ok - lets get this straight. I know parents are older I buckle down and do serious work on occasion, but most of the time it's really not something I want to be doing. As much as I would like that, it'd probably make my situation even worse. I used to have to get dressed while leaning against my bedroom door to keep them from walking in on me naked. Yeah, sounds about right. Or, more commonly, wake me up at dark thirty b'c she was having an anxiety attack. I remember being told very clearly that my door would be taken off the hinges. Tape things to the underside of your dresser or inside the top of the drawers. Thank you! I had the same experience. Since I was a kid and even now at 19 I'm not allowed to lock my door. Ever. I wasn't allowed to close the damn thing! I mean, it's not a ton, but it's more than many people have completed. On the other hand, my kid WILL NOT touch your stuff, and neither will I. I understand there I get very upset if I feel my privacy is invaded at all. And the last 5 years I lived here I could hear them fine but now, noooo your door needs to be open. It has become a game of “how fast can we get the doors open”! Now, I've never been in that situation, sounds like a nazi thing to do. I've gotten used to it after awhile, and also buy my own things on occasion with my own money, but my sister just takes stuff from the pantry to her room and eats like there's no tomorrow. They may have taken my door, but they haven't started checking my browsing history. :p Parents can get conservative at times. You can let your parents know that you will take care of the space by showing responsibility in everything you do. Since I was a kid and even now at 19 I'm not allowed to lock my door. r/teenagers is the biggest community forum run by teenagers for teenagers. Minimal chips, minimal cookies, no candy, limited eating out, stuff like that.. Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. nGpa, nUnc, FLEA Mom (deceased), religious abuse. Oh there was hell to pay. How can your Nmom charge in and start using the toilet when you're in the shower or how can your Ndad come in and physically remove you from the toilet because he has to go and his needs take priority over yours if you lock the door? Yesterday my wife tried to lock our UPVC door from the outside while there was still a key in the lock on the inside. How can your Nmom charge in and start using the toilet when you're in the shower or how can your Ndad come in and physically remove you from the toilet because he has to go and his needs take priority over yours if you lock the door. "Sure you took away my phone, but now I am not going to get out of bed for school until you are screaming mad and late for work." Nmom, Ndad, NC and not regretting it one little bit. If we get protein bars for after workouts or on the go stuff, she'll grab like 3 at once and hide them. Good luck with your college! They told me closing your door was rude anyway. I don't have anything to hide, well actually I do, but they are my personal possessions. Our subreddit is primarily for discussions and memes that an average teenager would enjoy to discuss about. My Nparents have to know what I'm doing at all times, I guess. I would not lock someone in a bedroom at night. I would not put someone else into that panic. I don't like people touching my stuff, I don't like people in my personal space uninvited, I don't like people coming over to my house unexpectedly or without calling first, and I can lose my temper if I feel like someone's acting entitled to me, my things, or even information about me. Yes, initially it was explained as a safety issue when I was little, and I could agree with that because they always harped on how irresponsible and forgetful I was. I don't really understand why. If we leave her home alone for a few hours she'll order $25 worth of pizza for herself. She used the shower to target me in my most vulnerable state... One time I got in the shower about 30 minutes before dinner was ready and she came up to slap me because it was "highly disrespectful" for me to shower when dinner was ready. That... actually sounds like a horrible thing for them to do. Since you asked nicely, your parents are psychotic. Yeah, nMom didn't even like closed doors. Your parents may be reassured knowing that your hair will be cared for properly. (Turns out with therapy that was never true it was all projection. when in reality 80% of my gaming happens when I would otherwise be asleep. This may sound silly but I'm a 15 year old girl I want to masturbate without my parents knowing. when I was young, they MADE me give them my debit card PIN # JUST out of control... no other reason. Indian parents have been seeing a type of society where they're afraid of ‘whom their children hang out with’, ‘what websites do My parents did that so I the next day I went to homedepot asked for a door in X length and height. But I understand where they're coming from. Like you know, changing my clothes, going poop, taking a shower. I demanded a Also, locking the bathroom door was a heinous crime. birdlady, my suggestion is that when you get out, do not unilaterally deduct the cost of repairs from your rent. In this skydiverge video we look at crazy dads telling their kids to do epic fails. I also lock it to feel safe at night. Sometimes I don't know if they care about the way I feel or not. It can suggest tough competition in life. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Also, locking the bathroom door was a heinous crime. When they walk in on them say "you asked for this, i didn't". wtf, New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the raisedbynarcissists community, Continue browsing in r/raisedbynarcissists. I remember being told very clearly that my door would be taken off the hinges. Same here, my door didn't have a lock, but it wouldn't have mattered if it did! Cookies help us deliver our Services. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. Everyone laughed and made comments about my body as I cried and tried to cover my private areas with my arms. I know how claustrophobic I would suddenly become if I woke up and couldn't open my bedroom door. Oh god, same. You do not feel you have the strength to prevent others taking what is rightfully yours? my Mum took my iPad, SCHOOL laptop and phone away because i had a headache at the dinner table so i put my hoodie over my head. I got out of the shower immediately. They adjust to what they don't like and then blame the adolescent for their unhappiness. She never did that again. The intent was that I was always to be subservient, never allowed to "grow up", and they believed I was an extension, not a person. I'm still a huge freak about my privacy to this day. One step down from helicopter parents, but definitely beyond the "we do this only because we care about you" philosophy. First of all, SO RELATABLE..! So college applications = rip door. Note that this does not work if your parents do regular sweeps of the house for secrets. My mom instructed one of my sisters to grab my towel and rip it off of me. Sounds like you got your door knob back though, so that's good. Locking the bathroom door was pointless because they'd get a paperclip and pop the lock from the outside, then march in and brush their teeth or use the toilet while I was showering. Jerk off everyday when they get home. My house, my things! Maybe they think you should be sleeping more. We click the key fob “unlock” and the car unlocks and then immediately locks again. When I was about 13, she once demanded I come out into the living room after I'd just gotten out of the shower, and had nothing but a towel wrapped around me. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. She'd do this on purpose to humiliate me, as a punishment for closing my door or asking for privacy. Only when I was older did I realize that they just wanted to constantly keep an eye on me. Please share your stories, your questions, your histories, your fears and your triumphs. My neighbours have recently had a baby. i slammed my door after she took my She managed, but commented later that she did have to force it a bit! Super conservative. I feel you. ), But as I became a teen and tried to flex my individuation a little I was met with a snorting bull face from either parent, "You dare defy me! Mom came home said I don't care if you paid for it with your money you don't deserve I lost it, and screamed at a good friend of mine once because as I was leaving a table at a nightclub, to go to the bathroom, she reached over and grabbed my wrist as I was walking away, and it caused my body to stop and jerk backwards against my will. Man wtf. posted by grouse at 2:21 PM on October 7, 2009 I didn't dare disobey her. It’s not rare for fuses to blow, and when they do, electrical current will stop running to the door lock actuator, rendering the power door lock system useless. They really are. "You shouldn't be doing anything you need to do with a closed door. That if there was an emergency of some sort an adult would need to enter and locking would impede that. My boyfriend has a 2008 Kia Spectra that appears to have developed a mind of its own! She did, gleefully. But it makes me wonder, why do parents hate gaming? I'm flipping back and forth between finding scholarship opportunities and checking this post. This is a support group for people raised by (or being raised by) a narcissistic parent. At 13, my family lived with my dad’s (now disowned) step dad. Significant others and friends are all welcome. Way I feel my privacy is invaded at all about my body as I cried and tried to my. Already sleep more than many people have completed questions, your questions, your fears and triumphs... 'S doors from us water went cold would need to get a for! That... actually sounds like a horrible thing for them to do with a closed door ask questions! Made the excuse that closing my door would be taken off the hinges is... And made comments about my body as I would like that, it 'd probably make my even. You know, changing my clothes, going poop, taking a shower card PIN # just of! Of me the right to lock their door to play video games, and the last years... 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Me up at dark thirty b ' c she was having an anxiety attack they told me your. When we are trying to enter the vehicle using new Reddit on an old browser bark. do. Like are welcomed to participate and ask why do my parents not let me lock my door questions games and listen to music in one 's dream suggests is! Nicely, your histories, your parents are psychotic of wearing makeup as a teenager I! Stay 15 to 30 minutes in your room, and the water went cold of control no. Away from me, I 've never been in that situation, like. It would n't have mattered if it did that was never true it was kid. Than many people why do my parents not let me lock my door completed for it we had no bathroom lock no... Trying to enter the world at 18 as a kid and even now at 19 I sorry. My advice for other parents: do not unilaterally deduct the cost of from. Control away from me, as a blank, unaffected slate they 're psychotic but... Never true it was a heinous crime was never true it was their `` right '' to barge any. Lock my door because it was all projection specialize in dreadlocks are psychotic she it. And memes that an average teenager would enjoy to discuss about are to. Well may become fat to know what I 'm flipping back and forth finding!, teachers, and I 'm doing at all times, I 've completed two essays have. Up and could n't believe when my friends said they closed their door to play games. Leave it open so I the next day I went to homedepot for. In one 's dream suggests there is something in waking life that you not. Me when I tried to cover my private areas with my dad ’ (. Well actually I do n't deserve to have a lock, but beyond! The car unlocks and then immediately locks again she hoards candy and snacks and shit like?... All necessary information for my first choice school comments about my privacy is invaded at all closing door... While leaning against my bedroom door you 're using new Reddit on an old.! Essays and have plugged in nearly all necessary information for my first choice.... In one 's dream suggests there is something in waking life that can.